While some buy luxury cars for their significant others, my man sells mine!
WHAT I’M WEARING:
Dress: Asos Maternity ; Shoes: J. Crew ; Bag: J. McLaughlin ; Bracelet: Marc Jacobs
I first learned to drive in my father’s 1998 BMW 740iL. If anyone is familiar with this car, or with BMWs in general, then you know how powerful and heavy BMWs are. My experience with this large sedan sparked my loved for BMWs; and I vowed that my first vehicle purchase would be a BMW. When I was ready to purchase a car, I only looked and researched BMWs. I was so excited when the day came for me to drive my very own off the lot of a dealership. A 2011 BMW 328i– it was my pride and joy, and it allowed me to travel and create so many memories.
When I first visited my now husband in Virginia with my BMW, his immediate reaction was “dang a BMW, though?” I guess it surprised him to see me drive such a luxurious vehicle, but for me it gave me a sense of false security. Financing a BMW in my own name showcased my financial independence and financial prosperity…at least that is what I thought. And as long as I could make the monthly car and insurance payments ( which is was about $700 per month), no one could say anything to me. So throughout my courtship, I continued to ignore Eric’s statement that “people with student loan debt shouldn’t be driving BMWs.” Although I had a ton of student loan debt, I thought I DESERVED to drive luxury.
As life would have it, my 3 year warranty expired in the same year that Eric and I were planning two weddings. No warranty meant I’d be financially responsible for any mechanical issues with the vehicle…along with everything else that needed fixing. Upon the warranty expiring, my car woes commenced. One issue after the next led to me growing extremely frustrated with my pride and joy. Whenever I would drive over a NYC pot hole, I just knew a light would come on, causing me another thousand dollars or so.
Anyone who knows my husband knows he is the most extreme version of frugal. Often ignoring the fact that he holds a doctorate, my husband will never spend money he doesn’t have to spend. The proverb “There is food at home” is probably his life’s motto. His frugality was actually a turn off for me in the beginning of us courting. It made me assume he was broke and stingy, but I quickly came to learn that my assumptions were far from the truth. He was just a good steward of his finances.
A couple of months before our wedding, my pride and joy broke down on the highway heading to work. My mechanic advised me that I needed $6000 worth of repairs in order to drive the car again. Herein lied my dilemma: not only did I not have $6000 to fix the car, I still owed $9000 on the car loan. Because we were funding with cash two upcoming weddings, I had no extra funds to fix my vehicle.
My intention was to keep the broken BMW in my parking lot until after our weddings. I would continue pay the car note and insurance, and just use my brother’s car to get around town. However, Eric had other plans. To my surprise, Eric had my broke down BMW towed from NYC to Virginia where he lived. He hired a mechanic he knew could fix the vehicle at a cheaper price, and then a month after we got married, he sold the vehicle and paid for the remaining balance of the loan. And Eric did this all in cash. Should I fail to add that Eric bought me an older more responsible car cash from the auction?! He didn’t want me depending on my brother’s car to get around, so he bought me one that better fit our budget. He also advised me that the first order of business after we got married was to sell the car. It was incurring too many expenses and it would deplete our finances in marriage. While I did’t want to do so, I knew he was offering sound advice so I agreed.
You’re probably wondering what is the point of this testimony?
Well, during my single years, and praying for my future spouse, I was very adamant in prayer about marrying a man with a high financial IQ. I desired for a man who would make the best financial decisions for our family, and who was far more disciplined in finances than I could ever be. I knew where I was coming from, and I also knew my weaknesses. I knew I didn’t manage my money well and I didn’t want my future children repeating the same bad habits. So I made sure to cover that ground in prayer.
While this testimony seems to be one of praise for my husband, Eric- it is really a lesson for those who are single and in their “waiting” period. There isn’t such a thing as praying enough for your future spouse. If you are to take time to create a list of characteristics that you don’t like in yourself, then you’ll certainly have a lot to cover in prayer. And if you can be honest with yourself and observe the generational curses in your bloodline, then you’ll certainly have a lot more to cover in prayer.
When I was single, I wasn’t crying to God about when I’d get married. Did I desire marriage, yes! Did I sometimes lose hope? Certainly! But with every disappointment, and with every year that passed that I wasn’t married- I realized how much more I had to pray about. God would expose my demons I needed delivered from, and characteristics that would be problematic in marriage- and I’d pray and fast until they were changed for the better.
There are so many things I prayed for in a spouse that God has answered. I always say that if there is something I don’t like in my husband, it is probably because I forgot to pray concerning it before getting married. One of the reasons God gave me the desires of my heart is because I counted Him faithful to do so. I never doubted in the area of my future marriage. I didn’t need a sign, a prophesy, or a boyfriend for 5 years to know that I would one day get married. The Word of God was enough. God promised to give me the desires of my heart if I delight in Him. I was just crazy enough to believe His Word.
Everyday I stare at my husband in amazement at God’s faithfulness in our lives. We have accomplished more in less than a year of marriage than we ever thought we could. And for that I have much to give thanks.
What about you? Are you crazy enough to believe God can bless you with small and big things? We are called to pray without ceasing, about small things, big things, and all things in between. Trust the Word of God, and watch it manifest in your life!
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